tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post6609306693181981300..comments2024-03-16T16:44:18.220-07:00Comments on Bad Cripple: Anger Helpswilliam Peacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00223601480542461802noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-67072260854838363122009-11-19T08:18:38.745-08:002009-11-19T08:18:38.745-08:00Off-topic, but I thought I might point out that th...Off-topic, but I thought I might point out that there was <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2009/nov/18/assisted-suicide-dignitas-house" rel="nofollow">a lengthy profile</a> of Ludwig "Dignitas" Minelli in yesterday's (London) Guardian, complete with a photo collection showing the garden entrance and decor.<br /><br />It's pretty sympathetic (the Guardian generally is so towards the right-to-die cabal except for the occasional opposing piece by someone like Lady Campbell) and they note that he sends away people who don't need his help or shouldn't be committing suicide. They don't point out that this might include a young man with a relatively recent SCI.Matthew Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16675719484819810707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-50271936368808822612009-11-18T00:17:36.608-08:002009-11-18T00:17:36.608-08:00The distinction to me has always been clear, but y...The distinction to me has always been clear, but you have put it very understanderble way. <br /><br />Another misconception I can point out as a parent is that, it's known that parents of children with disabilites are more "stressed", what should be made clear is that stress is almost always due to practical problems, dealing with doctors, insurance companies, education departments the reactions of others etc, and not to their childs didability. <br /><br />Going on from that, from Terri's comment, it may be that some parents are afraid of anger, because that anger plus stress tends to affect their (my) abilities as a parent.emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04195918097785592926noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-25827153329800478132009-11-16T17:24:13.539-08:002009-11-16T17:24:13.539-08:00I'm nodding and I'm with you, I just don&#...I'm nodding and I'm with you, I just don't have anything new or original to add as a comment. But I'm learning a lot from you guys.erikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03048369118376287016noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-65889220859599460942009-11-16T06:00:34.719-08:002009-11-16T06:00:34.719-08:00good post!good post!Greg (Accessible Hunter)https://www.blogger.com/profile/14284270514731142757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-21586796108275494432009-11-15T21:10:09.948-08:002009-11-15T21:10:09.948-08:00Bill, the determination others want to make about...Bill, the determination others want to make about my emotional state, i.e am I angry, has been the most isolating aspect of my experience post injury. I feel it is an expression of a common prejudice and is a manipulation that is often so personally damaging.... oh, now this is something to get angry about!<br /><br />But doesn't that feed into the ignorant perception of others - "oh, you are angry" - "no, really I'm not"- "yes you are, do you hear the tone of your voice?" - "Really, I'm not angry, but your insistence that I AM angry is starting to get to me, and make me ANGRY" - "see: I told you so, YOU"RE ANGRY"<br /><br />Winning can be so elusive.<br /><br />I don't think I have time to explain to them the difference between situational and existential anger. Can I just carry around a copy of Bad Cripple and give it to them? Say, when is the book coming out?<br /><br />Oh, and a one-liner recently came to me that I think fits well in this argument. I am post a break up and looking at online dating. Of course I don't advertise myself as "disabled" - I hate the word, but I feel the need to be transparent. So, what am I saying to others in order to be honest?<br /><br />My one liner that sums it up for me pretty well: <br /><br /> - I'm not a "dis" ...I'm a "RE"! -<br /><br />Hope they put that in their pipe and smoke it. Say, do you have an email address for "them"?Carwile LeRoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06671810227740109718noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-27430605904141661282009-11-12T09:55:00.697-08:002009-11-12T09:55:00.697-08:00This, I am discovering, is the more fundamental ba...This, I am discovering, is the more fundamental battle of our lives--more so than access. The right to live and to participate at all, to be treated as equals.<br /><br />One of my friends called yesterday and we were talking about death and disability, the idea that people kind of think she should die or would be okay with it at any time. It's really hard and she does have to be watchful and attentive. She mentioned a film promo that had upset her--Avatar. I saw it myself last night. While they could construct disability positively, they don't--it's a reality someone wants to escape from in this film.<br /><br />I looked over at my child during the film trailer. Her own eyebrows were raised. "You know what irritates me, right?" I asked. "Disability is not a tragedy," she said.FridaWriteshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03321658097813377806noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-61212906538482025682009-11-12T08:12:36.432-08:002009-11-12T08:12:36.432-08:00Misterc, Yes the situation is bad, surely the wors...Misterc, Yes the situation is bad, surely the worst in my lifetime. And yes hospitals are dangerous places especially for those that are not fully intact cognitively. We need to not only defend out right to exist but insure all those pesky ramps are in place otherwise we will be shut out of the debate (not that we have a prominent voice as is). As to being hunted, I am pretty good at defending myself. I am far more worried about those without an education or resources to protect themselves. These people are at great risk and disappear into institutions from which they do not reemerge.william Peacehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00223601480542461802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-80784617658011187242009-11-12T04:34:06.751-08:002009-11-12T04:34:06.751-08:00Bill can I ask if your blog gives voice to the nee...Bill can I ask if your blog gives voice to the needs of the disabled in terms of being allowed to live per se, or in going to games? Both can only weaken the message IMO.<br /><br />In this era of prey and poach on anything that drools, I would say all eyes on survival, and forget the ramps for now. <br /><br />I speak from experience and as one who has seen where things are really at now. It's bad, really bad.<br /><br />Anything that drools must never go to a hospital alone. Take someone with you who is very afraid and knows all about the brain... Hospitals know about the brain specifically to avoid the knowledge so you have to show smoke-and-mirrors won't work in your case.<br /><br />In fact, don't even let anyone know you are one that got away. Go and hide. You are the new hunted.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-79151627116067417082009-11-11T13:00:29.933-08:002009-11-11T13:00:29.933-08:00Frida, If every person I know with a disability ge...Frida, If every person I know with a disability gets the distinction between these two types of anger I remain puzzled why society is blissfully ignorant. Surely any person with a general belief in equality should see the gross injustices associated with disability and react as they would to defend any other minority group. I agree it is a tragedy when someone needs an adaptive device and is unable to afford it or denied it by insurance.william Peacehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00223601480542461802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-66212612399320647862009-11-11T09:01:49.918-08:002009-11-11T09:01:49.918-08:00I agree with this distinction wholeheartedly--I re...I agree with this distinction wholeheartedly--I really don't harbor any anger about what I can't do, and it doesn't make any metaphysical difference to me whether I walk or sit as I get around. So long as pain is still minimized, I don't even notice which I am doing until I encounter an obstacle--and it's the barriers to participation and equality that make me and others upset. Wheelchair use is simply not a tragedy. Not having any equipment if one needs it is.FridaWriteshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03321658097813377806noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-16466406764539143412009-11-11T08:16:48.572-08:002009-11-11T08:16:48.572-08:00Terri, Your point about some parents being too fea...Terri, Your point about some parents being too fearful of provoking an angry response to advocate is spot on. My son's public school has a disgraceful track record for access and inclusion. When I point out the inequities people on the school board groan and I am widely disliked. But my son cannot be harmed directly. I know this and wonder how my advocacy would change if he had a disability. Another aspect of the story I referred to that is positive is that it comes from the heartland of America where dissent is not encouraged.william Peacehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00223601480542461802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1556371561007953336.post-25858441661161556332009-11-11T07:54:01.511-08:002009-11-11T07:54:01.511-08:00That is a great way to start the day... Many of my...That is a great way to start the day... Many of my friends won't get involved in advocacy because they fear the anger. They don't recognize that there is healthy and unhealthy anger. Bitterness is bad and consuming... situational anger is both empowering and powerful. And way healthier for me than just accepting that injustice and prejudice for my child.Terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14802459265546733391noreply@blogger.com