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Sunday, September 19, 2010

No More Self Castigation

One and all I know implore me to stop beratting myself for developing pressure sores. At an intellectual level I know this is good sound advice. The emotional side of my personality however is far less tolerant. I chalk this up to my Irish Catholi upbringing. We Catholics specialize in guilt. Hence I may have left the Church but the Church has not left me. In short no more posting of self recriminations.

I remain medically stable but am in need of a blood transfusion. Debridement of the wound on my left was bloody. I essentially had bed side surgery--the details of which are too unpleasant to detail. I assume with the transfusion I will feel stronger. Today and yesterday my battle is boredom. Internet access remains limited at best. The higlight of my day was a sushi dinner a friend brought to me. Wow, real food. Better yet my brothere stopped by and brought me an ice cold beer. It was the second best beer of my life!

How do I cope with boredom? Lots of bad novels, football on TV, so yes I am desperate. And I long to answer comments many have made but cannot do so. As I said internet is severely limited. Indeed, writing theses words requires much squinting, a crappy key board, and far too smalll TV screen. Boy do I miss a real computer! However even the bad access I have is better than nothing. Okay that's all for now. Thanks for the support and I promise to cease beratting myself. Your words and comments help very much.


FridaWrites said...

My goodness--I am so sorry you have been doing so poorly and hope that the transfusion gives you much needed strength and helps in your recovery.

FridaWrites said...

Reading all of this--I am sorry I missed all of this. Husband was out of the country for 2 weeks/had inadequate help, this following me being too heavily sedated on Lyrica to read or write but able to exist through nerve pain. I'm alarmed things are this difficult for you right now.

lilacsigil said...

I was just in hospital for 4 days and that was boring enough - I'm impressed that you're maintaining this much calm and fortitude! But self-castigation has never done much good - maybe you should move on to fulmination! There's no shortage of things to fulminate about!

Greg (Accessible Hunter) said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your pressure sore. It's all your fault you know..... hey, these things happen the important thing is to get it healed up and get back into the game. Quit beating yourself up... from one Irish Catholic to the other.