Well the weather is finally warm and the ladies are out in their summer finest. Makes my male heart soar with glee. I saw many lovely women today as I was out and about. I guess I will never grow up--seeing a beautiful woman makes me happy. Gosh, men (me?) are so easy to please. And I am now the proud owner of more calloused hands--yes as I am doing more my hands are returning to their previous callous state. Thanks to last month's post I am no longer self conscious about my hands. I do not try to hide them like I have been doing for decades. I have manly hands and no one as a result pushes me around. Hell, I do not even have handles on my wheelchair--I gave them up long ago. I do not get pushed and I do not get carried. The only person that I will allow push my wheelchair is my son and only when I am faced with an impossible hill--think San Francisco or Seattle waterfront.
As pleased as I am with my hands I am not pleased with my beard. I am getting asked questions not about my beard, snowy white, but rather my hair. Yes, my short hair is now object of questioning. I do not like the question. People want to know if I am dying my hair or asking me why I don't dye my beard. For the record, I am not nor will I ever dye may hair. I am getting old and that fact does not bother me one iota. But I do not like the question about hair dying. In fact a large part of me misses my long hair. Amazingly even my mother misses it too--she thinks the long hair was preferable to my white beard. Go figure. This leads me to ask is it that unusual to see a guy with a white beard and dark hair? Am I breaking some sort of social rule I am unaware of? My post about my calloused hands led to a totally unexpected response. So here i go again: what should I do with my beard? I am tempted to shave it off but am hesitant--growing a beard requires two of looking very scruffy. I do not want to go through that again. I also love the idea of being a paralyzed Santa next Christmas.
15 comments:
In our family almost every male over 40 has a gray-to-white beard while the hair of his head is still mostly its original color. My brother at 59 has a uniformly light-colored salt-and-pepper beard and his head hair is such a solid-color brown people are always asking if he dyes it.
(sigh).
Most of the rest have some gray at sideburns or temples. But nobody has the same color beard as head.
And I must say, my husband loves the occasional wide-eyed five-year-old stranger who comes over to whisper "Are you Santa?" To which he usually replies, "Shh. I'm on vacation. Can you keep my secret?"
I love the idea of a Santa on wheels.
Can you do a fake beard for Santa? I'm sorry to say, I think the beard ages you.
I don't know enough people with beards to know if a different color is normal. Maybe it's similar to how my eyebrows remain black, while my hair turned white?
Second Summit, Ugh, your comment just reinforced why I don't like a white beard.
Ruth, Ugh, I agree I look much older with a beard--very professorial but older. Your comment also makes me wonder why it is socially acceptable for women to dye her hair but much less so for men. Dying hair is just not for me and yes I can fake a beard.
I think it's time to let the beard go and start growing your hair again.
Women dye their hair because they think it makes them look younger. Youth implies fertility implies desirability on a primeval level, I suppose.
I wouldn't think of trying to find a job while sporting snowy hair. Old implies past it implies unworthy.
Have you considered rocking the beard and shaving your head? I have no idea what you look like, though, so this might be terrible advice.
Becs, As always you make goo points. I do not disagree it may be a time for a shave and let my hair grow long again. I will give it a few days to mull over.
In any other field aside from academics a white beard would not be good for my employment prospects. As for women, youth and fertility is valued--far too valued from my perspective. I see no reason women should dye their hair unless they want a funky color--purple or pink for example. I like women with long hair, dyed or not. I am one of the few men that knows it is much work to maintain.
Untoward Lady, Now that is a cool idea. My poor mother would absolutely freak out! Here is the problem--I have no idea if my skull is nicely shaped. Some men can rock the bald look while others look, well, just bald!
Oh my gods, do NOT shave your head! It's gross horror movie scary when anyone does it! That's just my opinion, take it with a grain of salt, preferably around a large margarita.
I don't have anything against people who are bald naturally; that's fine with me. In fact, Sir Patrick Stewart is one of my favorite actors, and he's mostly bald. He's also amazingly talented, intellectual, and sexy. Yes, I think Sir Patrick is hot. Any man who can give that kind of a bravura performance of MacBeth is completely desirable, no matter what age he is or how little hair he has.
I agree with whomever it was that said to shave your beard- it'll make you look younger & more energetic, & then people will stop asking you if you dye your hair. You can always wear a fake beard for Santa.
Cait, No worries I will not shave my head. My poor mother would have a heart attack. As for Patrick Stewart, he is the rare actor men and women love. Men respect him because he is a bad ass. Women love him because he is the epitome of the manly man. However his is in my dog house as he is pro assisted suicide.
As for the beard, it will be history in the next few days. I cannot take the idiotic questions about dying my hair-I also look much older with a white beard.
First, I totally agree that Patrick Stewart is HOT. Especially in X-men.
Second, I can't stand having white hairs. I dye my hair every four weeks or so because I hate white hair showing so much! I'm not sure why. Maybe partly because my mom is sixty and she dyes hers, so I might look older than my mom if I didn't!
White hair on men looks distinguished, but it can also look older, so it depends how much value you give to looking really smart and professorial. :)
Ruth, The beard will be history tomorrow. I am bored by the question do you dye your hair. I prefer to look younger too. Old age will come soon enough. I can wait for looking distinguished. So you dye your hair as most women do. I wonder what the percentage is? I would guess well over 50% You are way too young for white hair. So funny how we men and women approach aging issues.
Stewart by the way had a very tricked out wheelchair in X Men. Very interesting to observe a cool wheelchair that was socially acceptable and more.
I'm glad you're writing a book. I've written one, too. It's called "And He Will Lift You Up: A Message of Hope in Disability, Depression, or Fear." It should be in print in a few weeks. You can check it out at www.winepressbooks.com or on my website, www.zaninajacinto.com Keep writing...It's soooooo worth it!
dear william, my name is lori ann and i am a quadriplegic paralyzed from the chest down and my hands too. i'd appreciate it if you'd read my story which is how my blog begins back in oct.'10 and start at chapter one. i think you may find it good reading. after reading your profile and couple of your blogs i became a follower.i hope you do the same after reading my story.
keep on rolling,
lori ann
As stubborn as I was about pushing myself when my man and I went to a museum, with my disease ALL my joints are afflicted, meaning my wrists pop and dislocate when abused... so I had to drop my pride and let him push me. Luckily he's light hearted, and made it fun and silly for me, instead of something to be self conscious about. :) Just something I'll have to get used to!
So... Christmas is here and I was wondering if Santa Claus's white beard will be coming to town!
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